Christmas Is for Lovers: 6 Hot Holiday Romances Page 13

  Tommy flew out the door as soon as we pulled into the driveway. He was in my arms in seconds. “Mommy, Grandma is crying.”

  “I know, honey. There was a leak and the water ruined things that Grandma treasured.” I set Tommy down and kneeled before him. “Do you remember when Ricky pulled off your stuffed dog’s arm?”

  “Yes, I was so sad.” His little lips curled into a frown.

  I cupped his cheek in my hand. “Grandma feels that kind of sad.” Beau kneeled beside me and wrapped his arm around my shoulder. “Beau and you are going to hang out this afternoon while I take care of Grandma. Is that okay?”

  Tommy’s eyes lit up like candles on a cake. “More than okay,” he shouted and he was off running toward the house. “I’m getting my coat.”

  Beau helped me up. “That was a hard sell.” Tucked against his chest, I gained the courage to enter the house. “Maybe we should let your mother handle this first part alone.”

  “I can’t. I’ve abandoned her the last ten years. I can’t do it now when she needs me so much.” I rubbed my face against his jacket and breathed him in. “I’ll miss you.”

  “I’m just a phone call away. I’ll have you back in my arms before you know it.”

  Tommy ran toward us and managed to stop his forward momentum before he could plow us over. “Are you going to kiss?” He looked up with a toothy grin.

  “I think that’s a great idea.” Beau’s lips descended on mine in a sweet, loving kiss. When he pulled away, he looked down at the doe-eyed little boy staring up at him. “Someday, Tommy, you’re going to meet a girl who makes you want to kiss her all day long.”

  “Yuck.” He shook his head and scrunched his nose.

  “You think that now, but I promise you, son, some girls going to change everything for you.”

  Beau took Tommy by the hand and led him to the car. I watched them drive away. When the silver SUV shrunk to the size of a pinhead, I pulled myself together and entered the house.

  She was sitting in the middle of the living room, sifting through a box of wet photographs. She had pulled plastic bins from the basement and was sorting the salvageable pictures from the complete losses.

  “Your dad loved the old Polaroid camera.” She handed me a picture that showed Dad and me planting flowers in the boxes out front. That day played clear in my memory. It was close to Mother’s Day and it was our surprise for Mom. I was eight and had no idea that I’d never plant flowers with him again. The following winter, he was gone.

  “He liked immediate gratification.” I tossed the picture into the save box.

  “Who doesn’t?” Mom pulled the next picture to her face and brushed it across her lips. When she lowered it, I knew why this was so special. She looked beautiful on her wedding day—beaming from pearl earring to pearl earring. Dad looked damn special in his tux. Their hands were interlaced and it was so easy to see how much they loved each other.

  “How did this happen?” She placed the picture in the box and picked up a new stack. That’s when I noticed her wrist. It was no longer wrapped in a bandage but was contained in some kind of firm brace.

  I reached for her and set my hand on the bone-stiff material. “What did the doctor say?”

  “I don’t want to talk about it right now.” She snuffled and wiped at the tears cascading down her face. “How in the hell did this happen?” Her unsteady voice had raised an octave from start to finish.

  Mom didn’t normally yell. She was more passive aggressive than angry, but I felt the accusation in her tone. Her words didn’t float over me. Each one was like a stinging slap to my face. What she was saying was, how could you have been so stupid?

  “I’m so sorry, Mom.”

  “I don’t want your sorry. I want to know how I’m supposed to survive everything that’s happening?”

  Twenty years of this, and I’d just about had it. Over the years, I’d cajoled her and consoled her. My father had died and her heart had shriveled up and atrophied. She’d gone from doting mother to the ice queen overnight.

  “Maybe it’s time to let some of this go. Maybe it’s time to move forward with your life.” I reached for the stack of photos in her hand, but she pulled them away.

  “How can you say that to me?” She dropped the photos into the save box, rose to her feet, and squished across the wet carpet. “You have no idea what it’s like to lose the one person you love.” She pulled ornaments off the tree and put them into a nearby box, oblivious to the fact that her statement cut me deep. “This is my life. It’s contained in these pictures, these ornaments, this house.” Each word echoed through the air and wrapped around my chest, squeezing hard. That was her problem. She lived through her things, and it wasn’t living.

  “How dare you tell me I don’t know what it’s like to lose someone.” I stomped to the tree and stood in front of her. “I’ve lost plenty. I lost Beau for years. But more devastating is the fact that I lost you and Daddy on the same day. I know what it feels like to lose.” Filled with rage, I poked my finger at her shoulder. “You gave up. You lost the love of your life and gave up on everything, including me.”

  “Oh, stop being so melodramatic. I took care of you.”

  I was angry. I could feel the fury bubbling inside. “You didn’t take care of me, you provided for me, but that was it. You shut down, and I took care of you. I got you out of bed each morning, I fed you, I cleaned the house.” I screamed at her until my throat hurt. “Hell, if we hadn’t needed the Sweet Shop to survive, you would have never gone to work. And even then, I worked before and after school to make it all work. I was eight years old, Mom.” I pulled over a plastic bin and began to throw the ornaments into it.

  “Stop it, Mandy. You’re going to break something, and it’s all I have.”

  I pushed past the box of ornaments that sat like an open casket at a wake.

  “No, Mom, I was all you had, and you pushed and pushed until you pushed me away.” My hurt clawed its way out, and I said the most awful words I’d ever said to my mom. “Maybe Dad didn’t jump in to save Beau’s dad, maybe he jumped in to get away from you.” Body shaking, I rummaged in my bag for the keys to the old Jeep. I left Mom sitting slack-jawed while I ran from the conflict.

  The first number I dialed was Beau’s, but it went straight to voicemail. I needed him to comfort me, to tell me it would all be all right. Next, I drove to Grady’s Diner. I may not get the warm fuzzy from Lou, but she was always good at tough love, and maybe what I needed more than a hug was a swift kick in the pants.

  Chapter 20

  Beau

  Tommy and I stood in the middle of the lake with our lines dropped into the hole I’d cut through the icy surface. Within a few minutes, he had his first tug on the line.

  “Beau, it’s wiggling.” His voice was just above a whisper. I’d told him the fish wouldn’t come if he made too much noise.

  “Let him get a good bite, buddy. At the next wiggle, I want you to yank your pole back.” Determination was etched into his little face. He gripped his pole, the same pole I’d used when I was a kid, and yanked hard. That’s when the real fun began.

  “Help me. It’s so big.” He struggled with the reel, so I stood behind him and helped guide in his first catch.

  “Fishing is a lot like falling in love.” I figured this was the perfect time for guy talk about treating women right. “You never want to raise your voice to a girl, or you might scare her away.”

  “I don’t like girls.” He struggled with his pole. “Except for Mommy.”

  “Some day, a girl is going to turn your head.”

  “Gretchen did that to me last year and it hurt. My neck ached forever.”

  I laughed because kids were so literal. “No, Tommy, what I meant is, someday you are going to like a girl, and she is going to take notice of you. So…I want you to talk nice to her. You want to reel her in with your kind words and good deeds.”

  “Should I feed her worms?” He giggled at his own silliness.
/>
  “Yes, but worms for her will be a flower, or a kind word, or sharing your cookie. Then, once you have her on the line, you do nice things for her so you can keep her.”

  “Do you want to keep my mom?”

  “I want to keep both of you.”

  Tommy dropped the pole and spun around toward me. His quick movements caused me to lose my grip as well. Without any tension, the pole slid into the water and disappeared under the ice cap.

  His little hands wrapped like a vine around my waist. “Will you be my daddy?”

  “I’d like that, Tommy.” I hugged him tight, and I thought about all the days I’d spent on the lake with my father. He’d taught me so much about being a man while we leaned over a gaping hole and pondered fish.

  When he turned back to find his pole missing, his eyes bulged like overfilled balloons. “Where did it go?”

  “Well, Tommy, that’s the next lesson for the day. When you have something sweet on your hook, you shouldn’t abandon it because it could be lost forever.” I tugged on the rope I’d tied around his waist for safety. You never knew when you’d run into rotten ice and with the runoff and warm weather today, the lake was unpredictable. I didn’t want to feed it. The fishing pole would have to suffice as our sacrifice for the day. When Tommy got older, I’d teach him to use safety picks, but for now, we had tied ourselves to the dock.

  While Tommy and I warmed up in the cabin, I checked my phone for messages. It was the second time in as many days I heard Mandy’s voice full of emotion. “I’m at Grady’s,” she whimpered and then she hung up.

  “Your mom’s at Grady’s, are you hungry?” It was getting on dinnertime, and if Tommy was like other boys, he’d be starving.

  “Hungry enough to eat the fish I lost.” Kids his age hadn’t learned how to hide their feelings and a look of disappointment etched his face.

  “Buck up, little man. There’s always at least one that gets away. But think of it this way, in the spring, someone is going to find a mighty fine fishing pole, so it’s like you donated it to a good cause.” Of course, I didn’t say that the pole would be ruined and most likely attached to a dead fish; those were realities best left for grownups.

  Mandy sat in the booth in front of the window, unaware of our arrival. Her cheeks were mottled red and her eyes were puffy.

  Lou was at the front door when we arrived.

  “Hey, Lou, is she okay?” I glanced toward my seemingly catatonic girl.

  “She will be now. Let me take Tommy back to see Rusty. What do you want to eat?” She wrapped her crepey hand around Tommy’s.

  “You’re giving me a choice?”

  “We all have choices, Beau, but the bold stand up and voice their desires. Come on, Tommy, Grandpa Rusty has been falling down on the job today. He needs his assistant.”

  “Hamburger and fries,” I called out after her.

  “We’ll see,” she called back before her and Tommy disappeared behind the swinging door.

  Mandy’s eyes rose to meet mine as I approached. “What’s wrong, baby?” I inched in close to her and wrapped her in a hug.

  Tears and words flowed from her like a volcano spewing lava. She tore the white napkin into shreds while she told me how the afternoon concluded. When she was finished, I sat in the silence and considered everything. Although my mother was devastated by our loss, she forced herself to push forward for me. Mandy’s mom, on the other hand, had done the exact opposite. There were many nights when Mom would send me to fetch Mandy. She’d eat with us and curl up on the couch with Mom until she fell fast asleep. Annie never came looking for her, knowing we’d take care of her. We loved her enough for everyone, and then I’d left her. Holy shit. I’d abandoned her just like her mom.

  As a testament to the goodness within, she sat beside me, more worried about her mom than anything else.

  “I’ll text my mom and ask her to look in on yours.” It was seconds after I pressed send that Mom replied.

  She’s here. Maybe you should stay at the cabin with Tommy and Mandy. Annie is dealing with a lot right now.

  Mandy leaned on me, but I was happy to take on whatever weight she needed me to carry. So many people had depended on her for everything. It was time for that to change.

  Tommy and Lou came out of the kitchen bearing gifts. Tommy held the hamburger and fries I thought were mine. When I reached for the plate, he shook his head. “This is mine. Grandma Lou has yours.” He flopped onto the bench and dug into his fries.

  Lou set a cup of soup in front of Mandy and a plate full of meatloaf and mashed potatoes in front of me. “Hey, where’s my hamburger?” I plucked a fry from Tommy’s plate and popped it into my mouth.

  Lou narrowed her eyes at me. “Your request lacked enthusiasm.” She ruffled Tommy’s hair and walked back to the kitchen.

  Mandy sat and stared at the soup. She made no effort to eat, so I spoon-fed her. “Open up.” I placed a spoonful of the chicken noodle soup in her mouth and turned my attention toward Tommy while she swallowed.

  “How about we have a sleepover at the cabin? The Grandmas are having a sleep over, so why shouldn’t we.”

  Tommy’s expression brightened. “Can we tell spooky stories?”

  “I’m not sure about that, but we can toast marshmallows at the fire pit.”

  I spooned another bite into Mandy’s mouth, hoping that once she was fed, she’d engage with us.

  “S’mores? Maybe we can find my fishing pole.”

  That got her attention. She sat up straight and pulled the spoon from my hand. “What fishing pole?”

  “Daddy Beau and I went ice fishing.” He sat so tall and proud. “The fish tugged too hard and pulled it under.”

  Eyes full of accusation turned my way. “You did what?” She slapped the table, causing her torn confetti to take flight.

  I waited for the last piece to settle before I explained. “You said to do boy things, and I thought about my best memories with my dad, and they were always on that lake.”

  “How could you? You know what happened on that lake.” She pushed the soup from in front of her. The warm liquid splashed over the side.

  “He was safe, Mandy. We went over every safety precaution. He’s a smart kid.”

  She turned on me like a rabid dog. “Yes, but he’s not your kid.”

  Tommy chimed in. “Yes, I am, Mommy, Beau is going to be my daddy.”

  Her blotchy complexion turned red. “You told him that? I asked you not to say anything to him.”

  Tommy’s head bobbed left and right while his mother and I argued. “I didn’t. He asked if I would be his Daddy, and I told him I’d like that very much.”

  “You don’t get to make those choices.” Every eye in the diner was on us.

  “I thought we were past this, Mandy. I thought we were together.”

  “Argh,” she groaned. “Let me out.” She shoved at my body, forcing me to stand up. “Let’s go, Tommy.” She held out her hand, but he didn’t take it.

  “No, Mommy, I have choices too, and I want to stay, and eat, and then go to the cabin and make S’mores.”

  “Tommy, this isn’t the time to be difficult. Let’s go.” Mandy stomped her foot once and stared at her son.

  “Let him eat. I’ll bring him to the cabin. He’s safe with me, Mandy.” I pulled the key to the cabin off the ring and handed it to her. “You go ahead. We’ll be there in a while. You and I need to talk about this,” I looked around at the people who had lost interest in our conversation and had gone back to eating, “but this isn’t the place.”

  She swiped the key from my fingers, and leaned over to kiss Tommy. “Be good. Mommy will see you in a little while.”

  She stood back and stared at me as if deciding to trust me or not. In the end, she chose in my favor because she turned around and walked out of the diner.

  “Did you tug too hard?” Tommy talked over a mouthful of fries but I understood his meaning.

  “I hope not, buddy.”

 
Chapter 21

  Mandy

  What the hell was I thinking? What the hell was he thinking? I tottered between regret and rage. I knew he was trying to help, but why the lake? Every bad thing that ever happened was because of that damn lake.

  I felt the lie as soon as I gave it life. Not everything bad happened at that lake. It was where I first made love to Beau. It was where I went when I needed a quiet place to contemplate. It was where he’d filled my body and heart with his love.

  No, the lake wasn’t bad. I’d made it the villain when, in reality, it was Mom and I who had let it continue to suck us in to its cold, vacant depths. She’d drowned while I’d run as far away as I could.

  The first thing I did when I arrived at the cabin was walk onto the dock. Two ropes were tied to the pylons, proof that Beau was looking out for my boy. I sat on the edge and looked to the place that had swallowed my father. He was gone, but I still felt his presence in this place he loved so much.

  I’ll never forget the first day he took me fishing. It was spring and we had rowed to his favorite spot, dead center in the water. We pulled in our bag limit and sat sipping soda. “Respect nature, Mandy,” he’d said. “It will always give you what you need, but if you’re not careful, it can take it all back.”

  Dad had to know the ice was thin that day, but he must have thought the risk was worth the reward. I knew in my heart if he had to do it all over again, he’d have done it another way.

  The sun had set, taking with it the warmth that had soaked into my skin. Headlights lit up the dock like a runway. I walked toward Beau and Tommy, who exited the car with grocery bags and smiles.

  “Mommy, we got everything for S’mores.” How could I not get excited about S’mores when Tommy was so exuberant? Honestly, it was all kinds of goodness wrapped into one melted, mouthful of joy.

  I grabbed the bag from Tommy. “How about I prep the goodies while you men build the fire?”